Giving Thanks

It was the day before Thanks Giving. Kids had come home early after their TG feast at school. Little s was wearing a chain they made at school with three leaflets, each one listing something they were thankful for (The teachers fill it out after asking the child to list the three things). The chain was basically left unattended on the counter top until I came back home. P casually mentioned about the chain, S and I grabbed it and settled down on the couch to read it.
First one said, " I am thankful for my mom". A good start...
Second one said, "I am thankful for my dad". A natural progression...
S eagerly turned over to the third one somewhat knowing what is coming...
Third one read, "I am thankful for the STAPLER"... What?, we read it again in disbelief.
I could see it coming... S is very sensitive about these things. She was clearly disappointed and her eyes were swelling with tears. "s loves the stapler more than she loves me..." she burst out between sobs. I was consoling her, wondering what to say and feeling somewhat helpless.

In little s's defense ( Not a strong one) here is the story about the stapler...Rewinding to Sunday afternoon...
Little s had the doll project which was due the next day (For folks on twitter this is the one I was complaining about). School had sent out an outline cutout of a kid which we were supposed to dress up as our child in traditional clothes, in celebration of the multicultural mix in their class. I had done some prep work like shopping for the doll eyes, hair and of course an Indian material before my trip, but the hard part of putting it all together still remained. I had picked up a small sewing machine for the dress. I was visibly struggling with the sewing machine and with a lot of difficulty managed to complete the skirt. The blouse was a whole lot harder and I didn't think the sewing machine with my limited dexterity was going to get the job done. S then came up with a brilliant idea, "Amma how about we just cut out a square for the blouse and cut out some rectangles for the sleeves and be done...". "Yes, that would work..." I thought. "Okay S...that sounds good, I can even get a stapler and just staple it all in place ", I said aloud. So I sent the kids to get the stapler. They went and they looked & looked but they just couldn't find the stapler. I was losing my patience, family room was a mess with glue sticks, threads , needles, glitter glue, scraps of cloth all scattered around...s was just hurrying behind S, bossing her around, looking all busy and feeling very important that it was her project that was due. Finally, I asked S to call Arke's residence in desperation. Luckily they were home and M said she had a stapler we could borrow. s ordered P to go on this emergency mission and there were loud cheers when he pulled it out of his pocket. Next few minutes were spent stapling away the blouse. The pins were covered with glitter glue and the doll was taking shape quite well.

So I could totally see why s felt thankful for the stapler and may be she could really sense the tension in the air that day to be able to report it like that to her teacher. Sahana's sobs brought me to reality and I was still looking for some damage control. I decided to take a chance called for s and just laid it out..."s, do you like the stapler more than S ? ", I was holding my breath hoping she wouldn't do further damage. "No...Of course I like S more", came back the response and she has somewhat of a disgusted look in her face wondering why I would ask such a stupid question. Clearly she had no idea what the teacher wrote in that chain, probably didn't even remember the teacher asking about those things and her answers. "I love you soooooo much S", she added, giving S a big hug and a squeeze. S was smiling ear to ear, clearly it takes so little to please this child.

I was just thankful that there was peace again...at least for now !!

Munchen : Past & Present

I landed in Munich yesterday. Despite my colleagues' advice to take a taxi to my hotel, I opted to take the subway in the hope that I may remember some portion of the city I had once visited about 8 years ago. The subway did work out great ( I was told that the taxi would have taken about twice the time because it was peak commute time) and it costed 1/6 of what the taxi would have costed me. However it did not serve the original purpose. I stared and stared at the subway map and no station looked or sounded familiar.
Munich is a beautiful town, no doubt, and has all the warmth, quaintness and history that I have learnt to take for granted in any European city now. What I really love about these cities is ofcourse their dependency ( or the lack there of) on cars. Everyone walks, rides the subway or their bike to work. The guy at work here was saying about how the office buildings only budget car space for about less than one-third of all employees. The number of bikers on the road is truly amazing (Not something I remember from my trip before). I was just walking back from dinner at 8pm and even with a glance I could count out about 10+ people biking in different directions on the road. Interestingly, the bikers here share their lane with the side walk and not with the road and a newbie like me can constantly annoy the bikers, zipping by, by straying off to the bike lane (In my defense the demarcation is really subtle).
Another thing I noticed is the awareness and availability of vegetarian food. In the past trip p and I literally found no vege food and had to constantly resort to MAC'D. We eventually got so desperate that we went seraching and travelling for Indian food. Germany was so off my radar as a travel destination just for that one reason. Absolutely not the case anymore...All places big or small (from the office cafeteria to a fancy brewery our hosts took us to) had a very good choice of vege dishes. The boiled veges were so tastefully flavored that I found myself gobbling up about 6 of the button mushrooms before I realized that I am supposed to hate mushrooms. Food was just not an issue at all...
No report on any European city ( okay may be not Oslo) would be complete without mentioning coffee. coffee ( just good ol' coffee) was so good. It is not just the restaurant coffee but even the kaffe' at work was just as good. Probably had a few too many cups today which explains why I am up like this...
Anyway back home tomm. Didn't do any sight seeing at all but I am glad this trip helped me change my opinion on Germany and put it back on my list of possible travel destinations. Guess "Never say never again..."

PS : To all the beer drinkers out there : Really sorry I didn't report on that. Even in Munich, that is just not my thing...

"But, there is more..."

It was Sunday and the kids had a play date with B and P. All was well and everyone had a great time. It was not until bed time that I stepped into their room. The room was a bit of a mess, nothing too unusual after a play date, so we started cleaning. I started putting away a bunch of stuff from underneath what seemed to be a pile of pillows. At the bottom of it all was my check book - the one that is currently in use at our household. "What were you doing with my checkbook?", I asked S. "It's not me, little s got it", came a prompt reply. Little s who was around the whole time gave me a sheepish smile and said "Sorry amma, I won't do it again". "s, this is not a toy and you shouldn't play with it, this is an important book", I said. I quickly picked up the checkbook and stashed it away where it belongs and continued cleaning. Little s continued to follow me with what seemed like non-stop sorry-s. I felt bad,it is not at all like little s to show that much remorse over something like this. I stopped, knelt down to her level and told her it was okay. With her big eyes going even bigger, she said,"Actually amma I even drawed in it".

Of the people, by the people, for the people

I wake up on a gloomy election morning and decide to be first in line when the polls open. I get ready as fast as I can and show up at the polling place. Not too many people in line. I eagerly wait for my turn. "Sorry ma'm, we can't find your name in our record. Are you sure you registered?", announces the poll worker. "Whaaaaaaaaaaaat, How could that be? I only double-checked about half a dozen times", but dizzy with shock, those words don't come out.

It is 7PM on election day, meeting at work shows no sign of wrapping up. "Sorry folks, I need to leave now, I haven't voted yet", I finally muster the courage to say. I rush home. It is raining and with the new day lights savings time in effect, traffic is really bad. I finally reach the polling place 15 minutes before time. There are about 50 people in line. After waiting for about half hour and 10 more people to go, "Sorry folks, the poll is now closed", declares the poll worker. I leave amidst moans and groans.

This time I wake up and with a bad cough. I walk down to the medicine cabinet to get some cough syrup, unable to believe that I am actually having nightmares about elections. This cold is making me delirious, I think. The clock read 2AM and our midnight visitor from the other room had already made herself comfortable in our bed. Unable to go back to sleep right away, I decide to do some soul searching...

I have lived in good democratic nations my whole life but never bothered to show any kind of interest in politics, let alone cast a ballot. My parents have been very conscientious citizens and I have never known them to miss a single election. My father is a voracious reader but never discussed politics openly with anyone. It has never been a dinner table conversation in our household. He would read up on all issues and instruct my mother which way to vote which my mom was very willing to do. She was the vocal one at home when it came to politics ( at least with us) and always held a very cynical view , always claiming it didn't matter who is in power, it would never make a difference to us. I turned 18 but then I was off to college in a different district. I am not even sure if my parents ever registered me to vote, so I was off for 4 years blisfully ignoring my civic duty every single time. The sad part is I never felt a twinge of guilt about it even once, may be at heart I held the same cynical view as my mother. I came to the US and did not have any voting rights (nor did I miss it) until last year when I became a US citizen. I never bothered to register to vote and coming to think of it, I cannot even remember if I actually had any intentions to vote. And then....The presidential races started. Can't really say what caught my eye with the elections, may be it is the media or the sincere citizens around me or the opportunity to see history in the making . All of a sudden, there was a force that pushed me into this frenzy and before I knew it, I was following all possible web sites, blogs and election reports. I followed the two party conventions, the presidential debates and even most of the interviews. I read up and had opinions on issues that I didn't even knew existed. Looking around me, I am clearly not alone. This election has energized and polarized the masses in ways that no one could have ever imagined. The candidate pool couldn't have been more different or diverse, whether it is age, race, gender or religion, there was something for everyone. There was more drama here than what the best of Hollywood could have conjured up. This may or may not be most important election of this century but to me, it was a turning point : a much needed wake up call. The cough medicine finally kicks in and I doze off...

I wake up (for real) on election day and it is in fact raining. I smile to myself thinking about my dreams (They don't seem like nightmares any more). P offers to drop the kids off since he had a meeting. I pack them off and call Malini to see if she wants to go with me. She couldn't as it was still drizzling and she didn't want to take Abhi in the rain. I went to the polling place clutching my driver's license and the voter registration card. There was no line. My name was located in seconds and the lady cheerfully handed out the ballot. I took it to the booth with the same eagerness I used to have taking a question paper for an exam, I was truly well prepared for. I took a look at the questions ( ballot) and yes, I was indeed well prepared, I had all the answers. I quickly marked them and handed it back with a great sense of pride. Yes, I did it!! I didn't feel like a citizen but for the first time felt like an adult...

Everyone has an opinion

I was driving the kids to school this morning. With the ipod left behind at home and kids being a little tired of what I had to offer from the same 6 CDs in my car which I hadn't changed in several years, they resorted to their next best form of entertainment a.k.a squabbling with each other. Traffic wasn't great and on top of it it was raining too, so I felt the overwhelming need to interfere. "Hey guys, do you know tommorrow is election day", I started.

"You are voting for Obama, right Amma? ", cheerfully enquired by 7-year old.

"No, amma is going to vote for John McCaine", came a sharp response from the almost 3-year old, whose primary mission in life is to disagree with her big sister.

"NO Sanju...Do you want the Iraqi war to continue? ", charged my older one.

Sanju who had no idea what either one of those words meant, could however detect the accusational tone in her sister's voice and realized that it must be something bad.

"Nooooooooo", came a defensive response from her.

"Then amma should vote for Obama, he is the only one who would stop the war", said big S clearly pleased that her point has been made.

Not to be outdone, "No, he won't" came another confident response from Sanju. It was all downhill from that point onwards with angry "Yes, he will" and "No he won't" exchanged...

I quietly admitted defeat and decided to focus on the traffic again.

Lesson Learnt : It doesn't matter what the topic is, regardless of age, experience or familiarity on the subject (or lack there of) , everyone has an opinion...

"Trick or Treat for UNICEF"

It was finally Halloween. Lot of fuss and hype over it this year in our household with this being Sanju's first trick or treating experience. Sahana had portrayed it to Sanju as being the next best thing since sliced bread (okay, make it a piece of chocolate). Actually I don't even think she actually cares for it that much, she was just happy to have some company in my view. Malini and I had decided to take the kids together around the neighborhood. For some reason it was decided that I will pick up the kids from school and needless to say I got delayed and by the time I came home battling traffic it was close to 6PM. I told the kids to make a dash for it, which they seemed to eager to do. Sahana quickly got into her special Hogwarts robe with matching cap & the wand to be one of the Gryffindor girls, think it was Hermione yesterday. Sanju was running around in her underwear unable to make up her mind between a Mickey mouse and an Elmo costume. Finally with some fuss, tears and drama Elmo won. Prem decided to join the group and we all set off to the Kumar residence.

We were greeted by a clown ( Abhi complete with his red nose) and a NASCAR driver ( Arjun) who didn't seem all that keen to follow the Halloween tradition. ARKE decided to stay back under the pretext of giving candy to the visiting kids (True intention of course was an hour of uninterruped time). Prem was tempted to stay back and tried to wiggle out, but it was too late for that. Finally the parade set off with all four kids and three adults. This year Sahana and Arjun had gotten a small box each from school to "trick or treat for UNICEF" i.e collect some coins for UNICEF as part of their trick or treating. We started off with a haunted house near the Kumar residence. Sahana refused to step in , while the rest of us braved our way through it. Clearly, we were the first ones there and a lot of the apparatus in there was being tried out for the first time. A small guy threw something at me from one of the tomb stones but before I could react, came and fetched that from me saying he broke something in that process. After this, We finished up with the rest of the cul-de-sac constantly reminding the kids : Say "Trick or Treat" or "Thank You", Little ones were particularly confused when someone held out a whole bag and said "Take 2". Abhi insisted he couldn't do what they were saying as he only wanted one, Sanju was wondering why they would offer only one basket of candy and say "take 2".

Meanwhile, "Trick or treat for UNICEF" wasn't going all that well and ran into a lot of technical glitches. First Sahana started off by saying it too softly and no one could hear it. We told her to fix that but then, she started off by saying "Trick or Treat for UNICEF" but most people didn't hear the second part and offered her candy and wondered why she still lingered around. Finally the winning strategy was that she would wait until all the kids got candy and then hold our her little box and say "Trick or Treat for UNICEF". This worked quite well in the next few houses though we did catch all of them a bit off-guard. Most of them went "Oh, you need money, I need to get some change" and told us to wait a bit while they dug out their money. By the time we hit PV road, the kids were on a roll. Ofcourse there were people who had no idea was UNICEF was , "Oh, you want candy for yunicef, could he not come along? " and others that had a perplexed look and pretended to not hear the second trick or treating. Then ofcourse there was Sanjay, " Oh, you guys are collecting for UNICEF ? That is great!!" and no movement. We were waiting & waiting...until Geetha gently nudged him and said, "Sanjay, can you get them some money? " and then the realization struck and he said, "Oh, yes, sure".

After a few houses on PV, little ones were getting a bit tired. Abhi wanted to take a pumpkin from someone's front yard intsead of the candy they had to offer. Abhi & Sanju fought over a door bell and greeted the lady of the house with some massive tears...They also started saying "Trick or Treat for UNICEF" and insisted people had to give them coins in their bucket. After a few houses in Celata we decided to turn back. Soon we were back at the Kumar residence, Mr.Kumar in the meanwhile had done a good job of emptying the candy jar. We decied to make a quick exit before Sanju fell apart as it was getting to be well past her bed time.
It was a fun experience, thanks mostly to "trick or treat for UNICEf" and the litle ones of course. Sahana did have an almost full UNICEF box, after all.

Sanju came home, spread out all her candy, picked one to try, didn't like it and threw that away. This exercise went on and after about 4 or 5 unsuccessful attempts went back to good ol' M&Ms.
Anyway it is Saturday now, the candies are all still spread out on our family room floor with strict orders from Sanju not to disturb them. I think she is really proud of that collection and anyway collection is more fun than actually eating it for these kids...